To be honest, my days about over I think so this prompt really doesn't mean much at the moment. My day had been a little Topsy turvy. I struggle along the line of trying to figure out who I am as a person and who I am as an entity. I also struggle trying to know who I am without her. She brought so much happiness to my life, with the little things so without those I really don't have much happiness. I know she's in pain too, and that doesn't help my ego at all. It's Friday so I'm drowning myself in a few glasses of wine. I want to talk to her. I didn't uninstall my messenger like I told myself I would. Now I just stare at it, wanting to sign on. Wanting to say hello. Wanting to catch up. Fuck, I love her so much. It hurts my entire being to know she's right there. In my mind she's a rose that is covered her in thorns though, something I've done with others untouchable in the past. I'm use to it. The only problem is when I grabbed onto the other thorns I was just harming myself... if I grab onto her, I'm hurting both of us. I don't want to hurt her, ever. I just want to hold on though. I don't mind bleeding for her, but I'll be damned if she'll bleed for me. I'm not going to make it the full ten minutes. I need another glass of wine and someone to talk to.
-A
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